January 2012
Mum: What do you want for Christmas?
Me: CAN YOU GET ME CLOSE ENOUGH TO MATT SMITH SO I CAN TRULY SEE WHETHER HIS EYEBROWS EXIST OR NOT? IN FACT COULD I HAVE SEX WITH DAVID TENNANT AND MATT SMITH AT THE SAME TIME? IN THE TARDIS? CAN I GET AN INVITATION LETTER FROM HOGWARTS? CAN I GET AN INVITATION LETTER TO HAVE SEX WITH DANIEL RADCLIFFE? CAN I HAVE SEX WITH ALL THE ADAPTATIONS OF SHERLOCK HOLMES? COULD YOU DECAPITATE DAVID YATES' HEAD FOR ME? COULD I HAVE MOFFAT'S BRAIN IN A JAR? COULD I HAVE A PORNO WITH JUST MULTIPLE ARTHUR DARVILLS? COULD I HAVE KAREN GILLAN'S FACE AND HAIR AND EVERYTHING? CAN I HAVE A CLONE OF EMMA WATSON? WHILE YOU'RE ON IT PUT HER IN MY BED WITH THE OTHERS. AND WHILE YOU'RE ON WATSONS CAN YOU BRIBE JOHN AND SHERLOCK INTO HAVING SEX WITH EACH OTHER? ALSO SEX WITH NATHAN FILLION WOULD BE NICE. I WOULDN'T MIND HAVING SEX WITH THE SUPERNATURAL CAST TOO. OH AND CAN SAM AND DEAN JUST HAVE INCEST SEX ALREADY? OH AND SHOVE CAS IN THE MIDDLE OF THEM. ALSO CAN YOU PLEASE FIND SUE FROM CATERING AND CONGRATULATE HER FOR ME?
Mum: what
Me: I said Just Dance 3.
John: Sherlock are we in these suits. In a church. With all our friends and relations... and a priest standing by.
Sherlock: Because we're getting married.
John: Sherl- What... When did we decide this!?
Sherlock: Last week.
John: I WAS IN SCOTLAND LAST WEEK.
Sherlock: Ah, that explains why you didn't turn up to the bachelor party.
How Sherlock Stole Christmas
daftwithoneshoe:
The good people of Baker Street liked Christmas a lot, But Sherlock, who lived in 221B, did NOT! Sherlock hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season! Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason. It could be that his head wasn’t screwed on just right. It could be, perhaps, that his scarf was too tight. But I think the most likely reason of all, May have been that...
zhainu:
fuchsimeon:
cucumberbatchin:
...
1 tag
3 tags
2 tags
Mofftissbatch
Benny: Aw man, I'm so embarrassed.
Moffatt: What's wrong, Benny-boy?
Benny: Somebody hacked into my ex's account and posted this reallly stupid video of me dancing to Thriller. Now everyone ever is going crazy over it.
Gatiss: Oh dear. But surely it isn't that bad? Everyone does a silly dance now and then.
Benny: I was still wearing the Sherlock mop.
Gatiss: Oh, your lordship has indeed commited an indiscretion.
Moffat: Not to worry, old boy, I'm sure Mark and I can fix this up. We'll just release a ton of Sherlock footage, and the fans will be too distracted to remember.
Benny: [Eyes light up] You'd do that?
Moffat: Of course!
Gatiss: Leave it to us!
Benny: Thanks, fellas! Well, off to drink eggnog with Martin!
Gatiss: But Martin is in Middle Earth!
Benny: Apparently there's wifi. Cheers! [Leaves]
Moffat: [Looks at Gatiss] So. The scene with the sheet?
Gatiss: My proudest moment. Throw in a naked Irene mocking our boy while naked on his lap, and I'll be happy.
Moffat: You wrote yourself into the show just so that you could step on Cumberlord's sheet, didn't you? What a troll.
Gatiss: I've learned from the best!
Together: TROLOLOLOLOL [geothebio arms]
OH, cheeseburger and jellybabies.: DO THIS. TRUST... →
repairalmostanything:
cheeseburger-jellybaby:
metel-filios:
louehhlover:
cheeseburger-jellybaby:
Steps:
1) Play this in one tab: (x)
2) Play this in a second tab:(x)
3) Melt.
Omfg, what are my ears hearing?!
It’s too beautiful!!
I’M FEELING THE…
December 2011
hyminh:
RIP 2011
2011-2011
2 tags
we'd probably liveblog the end of the world
omg earthquake!!!!
ahh my mom just got hit by a rock omg!!!!
rip mommy u were a good bitch
flood is coming!!
omg water is in my house
nO NOT MY COMPUter
it's ok i have service on my phone guys
OMG MY SISTER IS DROWnING
aw a fireman is here
he's giving my sister mouth 2 mouth
i ship it omg
otp; i know how to save a life
whoa the earth is like breaking open
byE
2 tags
In real life
when you meet someone a few years older than you: oh my god, you're so OLD i can't talk to you i'll embarrass myself oh dfhsfg
when you meet someone a few years younger than you: ew, no, get away from me, I'll break your brain with my knowledge.
online
when you meet someone a few years older than you: I DON'T EVEN CARE, LOOK WE LIKE THE SAME STUFF, YOU'RE SO AWESOME, I LOVE YOU, I'M GONNA TALK TO YOU ALL THE TIME.
when you meet someone a few years younger than you: d'awwwwww omg *squish squish* ilu you're so cute, here, read some porn.
1 tag
Reblog if you're kissing no one at midnight on new...
runbacktoyourfantasy:
onedirectioninfectionyes:
And im fucking proud of it!
i’m babysitting my cousins on new years eve
how sick would that be
Reblog if you purposely try to embarrass your...
Walking like this:
Dancing like this:
Laughing like this :
Being creepy like this:
When we’re in class and they’re doing a presentation, I’m in the front like,
I start making sexy faces at them like:
The last one.
So accurate.
